Everything went wrong

Well, my gallbladder's out.

Got to the hospital on Thursday morning for laparoscopic gallbladder surgery. 45 min operation. If only. I was very nervous in the waiting room, chatting with the other patients going for surgery as well. Then it was my turn, walked to a gurney, climbed on, they raise the rail, give me booties, a shower cap and a blanket. Surgeon and Anesthesiologist should come chat with me in a few minutes. The Surgeon came by, told me he was ahead of schedule, and I should be in recovery by 12:30, and out a couple of hours later. The Anesthesiologist came over and blinded me with his perfect white teeth, asked about my health, any colds, etc. I told him that I had Wenckebach, he said he saw that, but my EKG looked normal. It was a good day then. He asked what happens, and I told him that I drop beats, and sometimes go very speedy, and if over 150 for over 30 mins need to get to emerg for an IV drip. He said ok, see you in a bit.

I was wheeled into the OR, and now I understand why they call it an operating theatre! It's HUGE!! Yes, this is my first ever surgery, other than wisdom teeth, which while was under general anasthetic, was in the oral surgeon's office. Anyway, I was nervous, but the IV line was put in, barely felt it, I was told I might get a little dizzy and to close my eyes if it bothered me, and I was gone.

I woke up, and the nurse said "Una it's ok. I said "did they do it laparoscopally?" she said "I'm sorry sweetie, they had to do it the old way". I said "damn". Then she said "Una, do you know what a cardioversion is?" and I said "Damn". She said "we have to get your heart rate down, you're up at 200 bpm. I closed my eyes (maybe they doped me again, I don't know), and the next thing I knew I was bouncing off the table and letting out a big "UNGHHHH". OW. The cardioversion didn't hurt, the freaken surgery area hurt, although a nurse was holding a blanket over it. The nurse then said "great job Una, your heart rate is coming down. You're at 135". The Anesthesiologist came to see me and said "well you certainly know how to make things exciting! Thanks for being upfront and telling us everything about your condition, because it's exactly what happened". I grunted. I was thinking put those bright teeth away. The surgeon came over and said "we tried to do it laparoscopically, but when we got in there, your organs were all gummed together so we had to do the open procedure." Then he asked about my doctor and who my cardiologist was. I couldn't remember. They found out though, and my records did show exactly what I told them.

Because they don't have telemetry in the surgery ward, I got the luxury of ICU for the night. I learned to pee in a bedpan! Boy oh boy, we girls are trained to use the porcelain! It took sooooo much focus, and I really really had to go, stupid saline IV (we nicknamed it Ivan). On Friday I was finally allowed to sit up, had a sponge bath (I was covered in iodine), discovered I have a drain hanging out of me (which Steve called a gas line), and was allowed to go to a real bathroom. Because of the foot and half of snow we had on Thursday/Friday, there were no private or semi-private rooms, so I was put in a ward, with three elderly ladies. Poor things, they were all moaning and crying. Thank god for my iPod. I didn't sleep the night before, and wouldn't get any sleep this night either because the poor lady next to me barfed all night. So I planned my escape:

1. I have a blood pressure machine and have been monitoring for 6 years. I can do this at home.
2. I don't have a fever, and do have a thermometer at home.
3. I hadn't taken any of the morphine-on-demand since Friday morning, when she had me sit up. I was on Tylenol only. I have this at home.
4. I was up and walking when they took me off the IV.
5. 'Processing' was working fine.
6. I was tolerating my food fine, although it was still only fluids and jello.
7. I was already shown how to empty my goo flask, and how to clean the dressing if needed.

My nurses agreed, talked to my surgeon and he said if I was able to tolerate lunch of solids, they'd let me go. I was originally supposed to be out Sunday or today. They brought me macaroni and cheese. I haven't eaten since Wed, and they bring me mac and cheese??? I told KT and Steve to eat it and we'd go. They refused. Then Steve took three quick bites (love him). Then the nurse came in and I asked for toast. An hour later I got my toast, gulped it down, waited another hour, and they took the IV line and let me go. Wooooo!

Since then the radiant pain has been HORRIBLE. I feel like my shoulders are about to explode. Heating pads and Percocet help, but man alive, it's almost as painful as the gallbladder attack! I haven't slept more than 2 hours a night yet, nor have I slept during the day. I had my last radiant pain this morning, and I'm really really hoping tonight's the night I sleep!

What an adventure. Now to recover. Staples (25 or so), laparoscopic dressings and the drain come out on Friday I hope.

4-6 weeks off work. Sigh.